Here
I am
The one who became all she said she never would.
I am
The one who has walked countless paths,
Many I once refused to step foot on.
I am
The cocktails I said I would never imbibe,
The tears I said I could never shed,
The thoughts I declared never to have,
The puffs of smoke I once resented,
The cuts I never thought I would have slashed.
I am
The sloppy mess that is the drunk on the street corner,
The girl with a tear streaked face,
The girl who thinks of all that is horrendous
And then cleanses the world
With a burning cigarette between her two fingers
As if the smoke of her own vitality,
Will sanctify this sinful world.
The girl with pain, loneliness, and disappointment scarred onto her wrist
As if someone had barely managed to sew her shredded self back together.
But,
Because of those who hugged me through my darkest moments,
I am
The infinite potential of someone who is alive.
I am
The smiles I’ve seen,
The hands I’ve held, sweaty palms and all,
The random forests I’ve stood in,
Fresh air mixed with the smell of beer,
Surrounded by the laughter of those I will never forget.
I am
Grateful.