They say to view him as my father.

But my father abandoned me,

and my father forgets to love me,

and my father tells me "shhh" every time I speak near him,

and my father chose a life of "spirituality" over me.

I can't love a father 

without being afraid 

he won't love me back,

so I'll think of him as a friend, 

a mother, a guide,

anything else.

KF