Hello Future,

you're approaching so slowly,
it's hard to notice you sometimes
when you slip between the minutes
and glide throughout the year.

Hello,
I try to keep you present as I
swallow the smoke from my cigarettes

but mostly i'm just reminded of you
when i'm wheezing smoking-induced asthma 
in the breaking dawn of morning.

"good morning"
you say, 
expecting my usual coughs and clatter
as I reach for the inhaler,
mumbling

"fuck. I need to quit smoking."

And there you are breathing down
my neck as every hour you inch 
closer to me.

i'm wrapped up in academics, 
building the blocks that will soon
lead me elsewhere, to the future,
depending on how I do now.

you visit me frequently to say "hello",
 in my mind, my conversations,
in the ideal things I want one day,

yet no matter how far I get,
you'll always be there at a distance,
coming closer and closer,
yet always,
  far enough away.