Why is it that the very thing that is forbidden

is the only thing that makes me happy. Why 

is it that I feel strange when I see her smile and

laugh. Why must she be forbidden to me. I am the 

very thing my family looks down on, the very thing 

people hate and yet here I stand, when I see her smile

and laugh. I know she is ment for me, so why am I 

filled with fear by just the thought of her. Yet without 

her there is  pain in my chest that won't go away without

by my side. I tremble in fear of the thought of having her

and yet I cant stand the thought of losing her. Why does she

have this affect on me. What is this feeling? I want to stop

yet at the same time I can't let go, this forbidden thing is what 

makes me feel alive, and with this thought I have to let go of

these views that my family has pushed unto me and hold this 

presious human close to my heart. As she is my light in a dark place.