The hurt

The anger

The devastation

The thoughts and wonder ..

The feeling you hate getting but can't help but to feel

You wonder if there's anyone there for you

But after experiencing so much you decide to stop wondering

You want to feel like you have freedom or the right to be wanted

But you don't .. 

It's like you apply for a certain job and the opposite of you gets it

You try to think about why they didn't choose you

& You begin to question yourself 

Is it because of my skin color?

Or just basically how I look or represent myself?

You don't quite understand anything anymore

And you been let down so much til you don't quite know how to feel about some situations 

You've been pleasing people long enough just to fit in and you know that's not you

But you still do it just because you want to feel appreciative

You're not that person everyone see on the outside

Because that person on the inside just want to feel appreciated by people that will like them for them .