The Dysfunctional Earthquake Detector


I told him, many times

many times

To remind me when

The earth begins to jolt-

Yet he smiles

                              (pant, pant)

Red tongue with slobber

Never dared to bother


Mr. Waffles, ye fare to live under my roof!

Yet ye do not attempt to warn

With even a woof!


It is upsetting to see

That a creation of God like ye,

Cannot adhere with a mind

Like other pups, and serve mankind

For what have I fed ye for years?

Kibble, biscuits, bits of steak,

Yet ye still do not warn me

When the earth begins to shake-


Do not say it is not your fault!

Mr. Waffles, please do explain

your incomprehensible doggy disability.


Though he may not be

The all-perfect puppy

My love for him will never end

And I say we should take a stand

And care for his friends

For what more can they be,

Than innocent companions


...and maybe they will woof

When the earth begins jolt-


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