Displeased, Finished Indefinitely.
Dear The Ones Who Keep Hurting Me
See, what I don’t need you to sit there like you already know me
Don’t look me up and down like that right there, that look you just gave me
The shit I go through
The tyranny I don’t need
The judgment I am returning to sender
Fed up
Physically I am a nineteen year old woman
Mentally I am a thirty year old business man
Internally I am a sixty year old woman who is beat down and tired
I’m describing something real because I don’t need the imitation anymore
You know, the fake, the false, the afflicted, the shit
If I speak up I’m disrespectful and doomed for hell
If I don’t say much I have an attitude
If I fight back I have anger issues
And if I get agitated I am short tempered
But if I speak my mind I’m a bitch
The criticism
The ignorance
The absurd actions I have cast against me
Absurd actions I have cast against me
Me
Me
Just me
Not you
Over and over again
Until I reach my breaking point
These words are the music to my soul
My heart is the rhythm
And my tears, fuel my passion
Everyone is saying I only live once
And I’m stuck like damn…
No reincarnation, what if this time is really unsatisfactory
I guess I have to live by, fuck it, shit happens
I bleed tears of regret but never do you know
I am crumbled over to my knees by memories of affliction
Crippled by remorse
Hardened by torment
I cannot do this anymore
This type of life is not for me
Aggression, cruelty, narcissistic actions
After all, what is there to miss, about me
You said it, the words spewed from your mouth with no hesitation
Malice crashes down and trickles from my soul to penetrate me no more
With each step I’m taking in the opposing direction it leaks weakness to saturate me no more
Never more will you insinuate I am beneath you
I am done
So done that the fuck I use to give, yeah it’s gone
Somewhere
Nowhere close
So annoyed! Distressed! Jaded!
My face is forever dressed in a haggard expression because I am worn down and worn out
The hell in me ruptures, breaking lose
Enduring all of the ridicule and the agonizing, inconvenient plague that’s keeping me down
I am screaming, crying, fighting in my own puddle of misery created from the loathe that has transpired over the years
Breaking free, cracking the code, all while crumbling in my own ashes of history that I wish to never relive
Tearing down walls
Breaking these damn chains
Taking my breaths of fresh air
Existing while I’m so unconventional, never really fit into the mold that was created for me
So I’m saying so long to the suffering
Depression
Anxiety
Despair
Cruelty
Contempt
Venom
Bye extensive strain and burdens that I will no longer bear upon my shoulders
Sincerely,
A Girl… No A Flourishing Woman Who Absolutely Refuses To Endure This Insanity Furthermore.