Will ya look at that pie?
Oh my. Oh my!
Whipped cream piled high.
To die! To die!!

I'm sworn to a diet.
I sigh. I sigh...
With all of my might.
Oh why? Oh why?

I'll starve 'til I'm sickened.
I cry. I cry.
No 'taters nor chicken.
To fry. To fry.

To squeeze into pants,
I pry. I pry.
No fast foodie joints.
Drive thru? Drive by!

I vow to stand firm.
I'll try. I'll try.
And be thin as a worm...

I lie. (Boy, do I!)