dear past me


dear past me,

it's been tough


you've endured so much pain

for one so young


it sounds cliche 

but you and i both know that it's true


you've dealt with a lot 


a lot of anxiety


a lot of deployments


a lot of embarrassments


a lot of stress


and on top of all of this


you're dealing with an eating disorder

and it's getting bad


you don't think so yet


but trust me


you'll regret this later


now tell me,


does the weight loss make you feel better about yourself?

are you happier?



you know you aren't happier

you know something's off


this isn't healthy


don't let this spiral


pull up

just like an airplane


pull yourself out of this


and even though you'll gain back all of that weight


and even though you'll have to go through therapy


and even though you'll have to go through a lot of pain


and even though you'll think it's time to quit


never quit on yourself



your life is worth it


our life is worth it


there is help out there for you

there are people who care

there are people who are dealing with the same problems you are


find those people

befriend those people

support and be supported by those people


you're doing well

staying strong doesn't mean you have to bottle it all up

staying strong means you know when it's too much

staying strong means remembering that you can do it


give it time

you'll do fine


with love,

future you


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