I don't know what I really think.

Voices in my head tell me that I really do but I also have that other voice telling me "no you do not, don't listening to what you're imagining. Wake up, slap yourself. Are you really thinking that you do ha".

I tried getting outside help, asking for opinions. They all say I do and should go for it but I still got that remorse. Knowing that I don't, knowing it's just all in my head.

Getting told something that I don't care about but still I feel unease still I feel sad still I feel jealous.

Do I really feel something or is it just my head playing tricks on me because I'm just tired of being alone.

I'm tired of this always in a twist, always in a fist fight with myself, not know if I do or if I don't. I don't understand, at most time I know I don't for a fact but that tiny voice, that tiny feeling always comes by telling me "you do"

What to do what to do

Been too long thinking, wondering, assuming, but maybe.

Well, it has been too long so it should be a solid fact that I don't but why do I feel something tiny? Is it cause I started thinking again or is it cause I want to believe in a fairy tale.

I hate when I think. "Sigh" remembering every time I go through this. Nothing goes well, why can't it just die and be at rest.

Why come back and haunt, why can't I grasp reality just yet why can't I accept

Being alone for too long is just a sad thing but I can't help but smile and enjoy what a wreck I became.