[TW: SUBTLE ALLUSION TO SELF HARMING]
I'm not writing,
I'm carving into this paper like it was stone.
I'm carving,
I'm doing it on this paper so I don't do it all over my body,
All over my whole self.
I'm scratching,
I'm taking the pen and running it through the paper
With all my strength,
With all my rage.
I'm spitting venom,
I'm yelling at those ghosts.
I show yellow,
But I'm a gray sky at most.
If I stay silent
I might explode.
If they keep on making noises
I'll have to break my voice.
I'd rather just break pencil tips
And keep sharpening it
Until it's so small
It's useless,
Like me.