Her eyes haunt my waking hours.

Her screams fills my dreams.

Blue orbs search my eyes desperately.

Fear.

It becomes my world.

It invades my senses and controls my brain.

But it was too late.

Everything about that night was too much.

The night to black, the lights too bright.

It was all too much.

Too much.

The squeal of tires on pavement, the crunch of metal.

If only I had not gone to that movie.

If only I had not taken her.

My sister.

She was nine.

They said it wasn’t my fault, they said that the other driver was drunk.

But it was my fault.

Her eyes told the truth.

The days that followed were not days, but stretches of prolonged agony.

Memories blurred with the present and I became lost.

Loneliness took hold of my heart like a vise.

I still sleep in the room that we shared.

Each night I wake from the dream and turn to her bed.

The moon illuminates the tears as they gouge lines into my face.

I crawl under her sheets, under her blanket.

I crush my face into her pillow and whisper,

 “I will always love you. Forever.”