the beast
All eyes look at me
as my clothes slide from my imperfect skin onto the concrete floor
a voice inside me wakes and tells me i'm not enough
i wonder if i could be enough
i struggle to be positive
to feel motivated
to love myself
and my terrifying mind tends to take over my body
even on the sunny days
every little mistake haunts me
to some, it's just a number
a decimal
to me, it's my entire complexion
the true colors of myself
the true way-
my identity
and every little mistake haunts me
the beast inside of me wakes up
everytime it seeks a fight with the monster in my head
it's always awake
it's a never ending fight
my head aches from so much distress
and my head aches from fasting until the night ends
everyday
and every little mistake haunts me and kills me
the beast scratches me
bites me
hurts me
and my eyes flood
with the weight of control
control i don't possess
every little thing my body consumes is toxic
not just a number
my identity