Awkward
You’re not socially awkward
Nor are you any sort of awkward
But, what’s awkward is
When you say that you are
When you know damn well you are not.
You label yourself automatically when you say the words,
“Sorry, I’m awkward”
Socially awkward people,
They tend not to speak at all.
So what you’re doing is
Pre-programming others opinions of you.
Automatically putting yourself into
The excused category of awkward individuals
All because you think you are lacking
The energy to say,
“I’m proud to be me”.
But all it takes is the refusal of saying you are something you are not.
You are not awkward.
What’s awkward is that people
Have started connecting two unrelated dots—
Mental illness and beauty.
There’s nothing beautiful about loneliness,
Emptiness, nothingness.
There’s nothing exciting about self-hate,
Self-loathing, self-harm.
I know that from first hand,
Or rather
From my left hip.
Oh, Awkward.
Don’t you know the definition of awkward?
According to the online dictionary,
Awkward is an adjective,
A descriptive term
Used to characterize something or someone.
Awkward is 1—
Hard to do or deal with.
Awkward is 2—
Feeling embarrassment
Awkward is 3—
Not smooth or graceful.
You are 1—
Your own person,
If someone has a ‘hard time’ dealing with you—
Well my mother told me something about that—
Tell them goodbye, see you never, sayonara.
You are 2—
A beautiful being,
With no reason to feel embarrassed.
Embrace who you are,
And all that you stand for.
You are 3—
Okay, so maybe you’re not smooth
Or the slightest bit graceful.
But you trip with style.
Words may not flow like a
Coursing river…
But your mind is an ocean,
Vast, deep, and misunderstood—
Underestimated.
So listen.
You are not awkward,
Awkward is not you.
What’s awkward is
When you say that you are,
When you know you are not.