My constant fight

Is a battle with myself

I think most people fear

Something that could happen to them

What I fear

Some days is myself

 

I stand in front of the mirror

Frowning at the girl looking back at me

Wishing I were someone else

Sometimes just talking to people

Is a battle

The thoughts coming unbidden to my mind

I try to block it out but soft as a whisper it comes back

"They hate me"

 

I can't bother them

I don't want to be a burden

They'll probably laugh at me anyway

 

But I can't let this anxiety

This feeling in my chest

This feeling that I'm not good enough

That I'll never be good enough

Control me

 

I take a deep breath

And I talk to my friends

I smile at strangers

I keep on living

Just for one more day

And then another

And another

Sometimes it is a struggle just to live

But I will live

And every day

I face my fear

And I say

"You cannot beat me"

 

And at my darkest hour

My friends and family will help me through it

Because I will not give up

I will keep on living

And keep on being me

To show everyone else

It is possible

To fight your fear

And to win