To All the Monsters
I'm sorry
I'm sorry you think you can hurt me
That you can somehow reach through the dark and grab me
You can touch my dreams, but you will never have my future
You can scratch at my walls and rake claws down my skin all you want
You will never hurt me again.
I'm sorry I gave you so much power
Because you seem to think it's yours when all along, I owned it
I own my fear and my pain and my body and my mind
But I led you on
And now you think you own me
But you don't own a single piece of me
I'm sorry you think you have a home here
Because my soul isn't your hiding place anymore
And my mind is far too clean
I've cleared out my closet and swept under the bed and dusted beneath the stairs
I'm afraid there's no room for you here
And maybe you never belonged here, even when we both thought you did
Lastly, I'm sorry you have been hurt
I could see it in your eyes when you thought the only one in danger was me
You looked afraid and vulnerable
And the words in your mouth seemed a little foreign
It was like you were set on repeat, just spewing words that normally were meant for you
It was like you were used to being on the other side of our relationship
Sometimes you seemed to wait for the day where I would rise up and hurt you back
And though I can sympathize with you, I can't let you control me
I'm just sorry whoever they are still controls you.