blinking sleep away

the sky still dark

bruise colored with rain

rings around my eyes 

and I finally feel alive  

 

sometimes you get kicked down

sometimes you struggle

sometimes you cry a million tears 

for nothing.  

 

I've been fighting so long 

and I think for the first time 

I look at this wall

I've been pounding my fists against

blood on crumbly, red bricks 

and i've evanesced into the sky 

 

the nightmare ended

and I return to the soft, grey light

sleeping in my own bed 

only a few months 

and I feel I have returned to 

a child's room,

a child's memories

a child's forgotten dreams.

 

the world was so different then.

her world was so different.

fighting to break free

she ended up fighting herself 

tried desperately to end it all. 

 

I miss her sometimes.

that sad, quiet kid

she never stood a chance  

 

and I the new flame

born from the ashes 

of another person

another life

another past  

 

I feel so alive.